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Reasons Why I should have realized earlier that Q was Hard Of Hearing or Possibly Deaf
He always cried if he couldn't see us or touch us
I would sing to him constantly, talk to him as I walked away, but unless I was near he was easily discontented and didn't soothe quickly. Considering how mellow he was when we held him, it was strange
He absolutely HATED the car - unless someone would sit in back with him
He hated it so much at night, that we simply quit driving when it was dark
He also hated the baby carriers unless he was facing us, and not forward
When he was big enough for forward facing strollers, he also hated those unless we walked beside or in front of him.
He hated tummy time, and would ALWAYS roll to his back as soon as he was able
July 4, 2015 - took Q to the parade in Brandon with our family. Our normal busy boy who didn't like to nap decided to take an hour nap, amidst all the chaos, sirens, and loudness.
We had a smoke detector in need of new batteries going off whilst he slept, and were thankful that he didn't wake up even though it was incredibly loud
He wasn't an easily startled baby or kid, unless it was visual
He took awhile to sit up fully unassisted, even though he was very strong
He had what we called 'whoopsie' days, that we attributed to growth spurts, where he was very clutzy or wobbly.
MANY of the audiologists and ENT's asked us about balance issues, it's very attributable to inner ear problems especially in children
Minus Q's 'whoopsie' days, he was incredibly dexterous and balanced, over all, he climbed everything and was very agile
He did however, continually always bump his head. He always seemed top heavy, and every fall would be a head bump. He had a few that we felt were serious ones, but after taking him to our PCP and calling frantically, she assured me that most kids were 'built' that way and unless it was back of the head to not worry too much
He never missed anything visually
We started with baby signing flashcards as soon as he was sitting upright and eating semi-solid foods
He loved it, he was always engaged, and we always had great fun playing when facing each other
He LOVED anything that had lights - all of his 'favorite' toys were ones that lit up, and he thought the TV was wondrous
We had a lot of moving parts in our family:
Jim had to go back to work the day after we were released from the maternity ward, and he worked very long days with a long commute. I was doing Dr. appointments, caring for myself, and caring for Q mostly on my own. We had some family help, and some friends, but the majority was on myself and Jim
C Sections are a tough recovery
My father suffered two episodes of congestive heart failure, and my sister was diagnosed and treated for kidney cancer
Q's first day of daycare at 3 months old, he had nursemaids elbow. We spent two days in the ER and back and forth to the hospital as we were told initially that it was broken
This alone is an entire blog post in itself, and contributed to tremendous anxiety issues, fear, and an incredible amount of stress
I feel that working full-time allowed Q's needs to fall behind while we stumbled through the basics. "If I had been home I would have noticed", and I feel that due to all the other external stress factors, my empathy and intuition was treated as "You worry too much". Which I do, and I accept, but I KNEW something was off and I didn't push for it...but I'm learning
Self blame and self doubt - I was working full-time at a strenuous job with a controlling supervisor who allowed me no flexibility, add to that the basics of regular work, home life, paying bills, cooking dinners and keeping my baby fed, loved, and attempting to sleep here and there...
Due to maternity leave I had little to no time off upon my return to work, and being a working family I could not quit my job and leave Jim responsible for keeping us afloat
Due to lack of daycare, my parents thankfully stepped into help, and moved in with us
Any normal family, regardless of love and strength of relationship, battles with change and friction during moves and times like this
My Cat of 11 years fell ill and had to be put down, and my source of comfort was ripped from me
We tried to move nearer to our jobs! It would help ease commute time, give us greater access to good daycares, and would help to ease work/life stress. We were in the process of negotiating our house as sold and found a new and incredible home - and upon inspection were told our current homes septic was failing
Our title insurance, nor our home owners insurance covered it. We had to take out personal loans to cover an enormous cost, and therefore could not afford to move, and subsequently could barely afford anything let alone a new daycare
We could not take action against previous owners who had installed a hack job system that was not up to code nor was it registered with the state
And thanks just an inkling of the basics while we dealt with the day to day of our gorgeous and wonderful son!